Convoy of fermented grapefruit merchants and organic Jute resellers travelling the barren wastes require a versatile individual to fill the position of industrial strength optimist.
The ideal candidate should have a sense of humour and a positive attitude.
Applicants with a funny bone certified by the ministry of health will receive a higher preference. A knowledge of the fermented grapefruit & the organic Jute resale business models is preferred but not essential.
Primary duties include
- Provide a humorous counter point during dire (seemingly Apocalyptic) situations.
- Problem solve and mediate disputes with humour to architect positive organisational & person centric outcomes.
- Maintain a humorous atmosphere centred around the mutually beneficial aspects of the collaboration between the fermented grapefruit and the organic Jute resale business models.
- Contributing to, managing, repairing and re-engineering the expedition’s stock of puns.
- Sing or play humorous/uplifting music when require using the expedition’s tambourine.
- Defend expedition in the event of an attack by bandits (Candidate must show proof of proficiency with using assault rifles).
Other duties may include
- Slaughtering pack animals for food (should we run out of supplies – which has not happened yet)
- Hunting wild animals for same after pack animals have been eaten
- Leading sing alongs while awaiting rescue once food supplies have run out (though this sort of thing has never happened before).
(Vegans & Vegetarians need not apply as you all taste funny).
- Adventure of a life time
- Food, lodging, personal side arm, and tambourine will be supplied
- Salary & journey completion fee on return
- Discounts (negotiable) on all fermented grapefruit/organic jute purchases for 3 years