People’s Republic of Dehiwala


Following is a draft for the entry on the People’s Republic of Dehiwala. It is currently open for content and structural edits/additions.

Overview:

People’s Republic of Dehiwala is a microstate located in western and southern Sri Lanka. The country is divided into eleven districts. Two are located in Dehiwala south: Northern South Dehiwala and Southern South Dehiwala. [Map in SVG format need]. The 83% of the country covers the southern suburbs of the city of Colombo. The remainder, (South Dehiwala) occupies a 28 km radius around the coastal town of Unawatuna.

The PRD was founded in the aftermath of the last Sri Lankan war. Its complex origins are well documented in “The third wheel: Emergence of a Microstate Power in Post Conflict Sri Lanka” by Goliath White [Kottu Publishing, Eastern West Dehiwala].

The PRD has a customs and currency union with Federal Republic of Ceylon (FRC) government, and the Kingdom of Sri Lanka (KSL) enabling visa free travel for PRD citizens. Their wealth, easy yet shrewd generosity and armed self confidence have earned PRD citizens the nickname “Dehiyo” (a play on the Sinhalese word for deities and Dehiwala) by the impoverished FRC citizens.

Flag

Flag of the People's Republic of Dehiwala
Image created by the chair of the PRD’s. Central cultural committee.

See entry on the flag of the People’s Republic of Dehiwala.

Capital: Galkissa (also called Mt Lavaniya).

Sights: Cassarole hotel which along with its famous sign has remained miraculously undamaged.

Demographics:

Population figures and census data are a state secret. It is illegal to collect demographic data. [citation needed]. The PRD’s location and its performance as open yet well regulated financial has attracted a diverse expatriate population. They include Californian refugees in their distinctive pink and green head dress and many Norwegian dissidents.

Transport

Main airport: Ravana international links the PRD to major destinations throughout the Thai Empire, the East African Economic Union, the United States of Hindustan, and the middle east. Viman Air has a daily non stop flight to the Free State of Mogadishu which has close military and economic ties with the PRD.

A regular hydrofoil service operates from Kinross pier to Dehiwala south. The primary mode of transport are the ubiquitous three wheelers.

Government:

Structure of government has frequently been compared to ancient Athens and Pre annexation Switzerland. Each district appoints a monthly chair person who heads a structure of citizens’ committees. The role of head of government rotates among the districts via a lottery.

District level autonomy is quite significant. Southern South Dehiwala restricts public nudity for adults without a criminal record. The more conservative district of Southern North Dehiwala restricts public nudity to permit holders for weekends.

The primary governing body appears to the national defence co-originating committee headed by Captain-Major Rodrigue Pushpakumara Van Parakramabahu (ret.) commonly called “Pushpe ayiya”. Mr Parakramabahu is one of the state’s founders and commanded the Elara and Singhabahu armoured Trishaw units during the siege of Colombo. [Herge, L: Scorpions of Paradise]

[Government org chart in SVG format]

Economy:

Confidential banking, tourism and organic ginger beer production. The constitution permits citizens to establish and operate confidential banks. It guarantees state protection for anyone irrespective of citizenship complete banking confidentiality. Taxation is illegal and entry into the country by foreigners connected with taxation bodies are banned. Citizens from the KSL and the FRCey are not covered by this clause.

The wealth generated by banking enables PRD citizens to devote their time to affairs of state. Most of the country’s workforce consists of Ceylonese citizens.

Aliya and Tucker brands of organic ginger beer have developed a phenomenal following in the Thai Empire and the East African Economic Union.

Currency: the Dehiwala Rupee (DRs) which is pegged to the Federal Ceylon rupee (1 DRs = 1038.0743 FedCeyRs). It is locally referred to as the “Dehi”. [citation need — exchange rate link required].

Military:

The PRD defence fore (PRDDF) has a professional core supported by a larger citizens’ militia. Virtually all adult citizens are ex combatants in the siege of Colombo, A vast majority were members of the former Colombo defence volunteer force. The remainder consists of veterans of the disbanded western province army and other defunct Ceylon military units.

Adult citizens are required by law to carry automatic weapons at all times. Consequently the PRD is reputedly has one of the highest concentration of weapons per capita in any peace time state. PRD citizens take great pride in personalised weaponry and has made the country the largest global market for customised Škorpion submachine guns.

Society and Culture:

The average citizen of the PRD has been described as 31, multi ethnic, urbanised, wealthy, egalitarian, and easy going. Dehiwala culture is famous for its multi lingual puns and complex nick name structure. PRD is also well known for its liberal social laws. Marriage for example is treated as a consensual legal contract between two adults without any reference to gender. Famously, multiple contracts are possible with the consent of other contract holders.

Official cocktail: Dehiwala Lemonade

This patented combination of Rum, Aliya ginger beer is inexplicably nicknamed Lunu Dehi has become extremely popular.

Additions and edits:

Please use the comment box below to expand this entry for alpha release.

10 comments

  1. what do you mean Switzerland was annexed!😡 lol😛😉

    The PRD sounds awesome, but I think I’ll still root for the KSL!😀 and you’ve got a picture of the casserole sign!!! I used to pass that everyday on the way to school and chuckle at it!😀 good times! lol😉

    Like

  2. shih! there was a time when i used to read proper posts in this blog.. guy gets married and now he’s lost it.. poor Cerno…

    hahaaaa,… good one Cerno..

    err… can i be the Commander-in-Chef (yes,Chef..like Chef Publis..) of the Peoples Petriotic Air Force of People’s Republic of Dehiwala [2P(AFRD)] ?

    can take over Ratmalana AB/Katukurunda etc, after we force SLAF to vacate it..surrender all aviation assets,equipment, armament,clothing,barb wire,swimming pool,..d mine field..and that old SLAF bus from 1930s etc..

    and then we take over the rickety old rigs in the SLAF Museum + Lion Air and set up our own Air Force..can have a major smuggling racket set up between Republic of Dehiwala and Republic of Maldives for starters and then expand all the way to Mombasa and Surabaya…

    think about it and get back to me… ASAP.. in the mean time i’ll work on the details…

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  3. Society and Culture – Sports
    Each evening the populace of Dehiwala (Dehiwilians ?) can be observed as they engage in two main activities that mark the end of the day. The first one is a popular family activity which consists filing multi colored buckets,pots and pans and various other types of containers with “pipe borne” water. “Pipe borne” water is rare commodity in this district and often due to popular demand the pipes only become active from 4:00pm to 9:00pm each evening. The rest of the day the Dehiwala Water Board transports valuable air though this pipe system that enables the inhabitants to make an interesting hissing noise in their houses.

    The second activity can only be observed by a select group of Dehiwilians as it is a sport practiced between the hours of 12:00pm and 4:00am. The main objective of this sport is to enter a house in random and remove some of the belongings of the occupants without their knowledge. Minus marks are given when the the occupants of the house are startled. Some of the occupants choose to participate in this sport by either screaming or by throwing objects at these sporty Dehiwilians. The occupant participation in this sport is usually frowned upon and the sportsmen may try to restrain them when it happens.
    At rare instances where the players are over powered and given a ride in the referees green jeep then they miss the next few rounds of this game.

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  4. Kiri: Brilliant🙂

    Chavie: Yes its the Austrians again…😉

    Dulan: Thank you😀

    tinker777: You must be Air Commodore Publilis Appuhamilage De Hoot – also known as – “tinker chef” who commands the PRDAC (PRD Air Corps). The PRDAC operates out of Ravana international. The Commodore famously managed to maintain a flying unit of VTOL interceptor during the siege of Colombo while serving in the FRCeyAF (Federal Republic of Ceylon Air Force). He is also know to be an mechanical and engineering genius credited with keeping his air craft operation in trying conditions. Consequently he never receives at any dining establishment in PRD. A skilled pilot, he led many daring operations – most notably the evacuation of the Sinhabahu and Elara regiment survivors from Bentota. He is credited with 11 arial victories.

    Anne Brilliant!

    St. Fallen : You might be eligible for PRD citizenship – though the application process is tricky. Helps if you are good at driving armoured trishaws.

    Like

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